kailan

 

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DEVASTATED MELODY

Every moment i turn myself to sleep,

i couldn’t control myself not to weep

each time i would go to my slumber

all i want is to be with you forever

i could hardly remember the sweetest smile on your face

it gives me joy even in simple ways

your misterious lokkk that makes me uneasy

it was chasing me uncomfortably

How i missed to hear you sing a song for me

just as i closed my eyes your voice accompanies me

but the music you made had gone and left me

where could i find the devastated melody?

 every  note from that piano you used to play

the sound ot your guitar that makes me sway

were now gone lika a colorful rainbow

just like a dust that fades as the wind blow

you are like a rain that fell out from the sky

come unexpectedly without giving reason why

and when it is time that i got used to it, it would leave without saying goodbye

and i have nothing else to do but to cry

untold

“LOVE vs AMBITION”

I looked at you and you smiled at me. And all my days started to change. You are the one who gives me reason to smile every morning and the one who caused my sweetest dreams at night. And I’ve realized that I have this feeling or you, a feeling which they called as “LOVE”. But the greatest tragic in my lie came when my parents announced that I should leave to find my luck further from you. This news broke my heart because I would be separated from you. This brought me to confusion! Should I choose my ambition far from you or choose you, away from my ambition?

“THE TRUTH BEHIND LIES”

(The secrets behind love vs ambition)

“I LOVE YOU AS A FRIEND, AS A BROTHER…” These words… these are the words that hurt him a lot. But now, these are the words that were hurting me a lot… “YOU LOVE ME JUST AS A FRIEND, JUST AS A BROTHER…” Now I loose a friend, a companion, a brother… And I don’t know now how to bring him back. My greatest fear came into reality… “PLEASE STAY, PLEASE DON’T GO” I pleaded him not once or twice but many times… Is it hard for him to stay??? “WHEN YOU NEED ME, JUST CALL ME AND I WOULD BE THERE” But where is he now? Does he vanish just like his promises…?

In life, you have nothing to hold on to but yourself and the courage to accept all the unexpected things that may come into your way. Sometimes, people are kind in the beginning but may be cruel in the end. They might be there from the start but when you need them, they would just leave you behind. Just like garbage that is thrown into thrash after they have profit. What hurts more is when you find out that all they have shown to you are lies… and the hardest part is we have fallen in love into them more than we have planned to… And we don’t know what is what and which is which!!! All we know is we love them without asking anything in return but their happiness.

Last April, I have written “LOVE VS AMBITION”. Why? Because that was the time that I realized that I’m in love with one person. I don’t have to mention his name… I just don’t have the courage that time to tell him how I love him, what I feel for him. “DO YOU LOVE ME?” “YES I LOVE YOU AS A BROTHER” I know it would hurt him but I just need to. I have no choice. I was confused that time. I was afraid. I’m coward! I’m coward to admit that I love him. I hide my feelings because I’m afraid because I’m not sure of my feelings. I’m afraid to loose him! But now he’s gone forever… “I’LL BE BACK, I PROMISE…” Now these are the only words I’m holding on right now.